14
2017
08

具体不记得这个小伙了,雅思PTE 代考四个7 澳洲澳洲也是不是问题,联系我们靠谱代考

 

Solving environmental problems should be the responsibility of one international organization instead of state or national government. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

An increasing numbers of environmental problems make both
institutions and governments
[mg1] concerned. I believe that solving environmental such problems should not be the responsibility of one international organization alone.

To begin with, it is seems that international organizations such as World Wildlife Fund or WWF, are more
indeed
[mg2]  professionals in on solving environment problems. The international These organizations have has the ability to call for experts in related relative fields from all over all of the globe. Most of them possess highly specialized knowledge and rich experiences on environmental issues. Additionally, a great deal of resources are is [mg3] available in and are used byfor international organizations such as. automated detection machines, advanced robots, and support equipments[mg4]  which are used by international would be far more effective on in solving environmental problems. Furthermore, international organizations can be able to gather the helps from various countries and take charge of international cooperation,; and thus, can effectively solve the environmental issues.

However, it is generally accepted that one of the government's unique functions is legislation which the government can standardizes behaviors in managing and improving environmental protection through policies so that the serious problems would be controlled to some extent. Besides, the policies about environmental protection are authorized and convincing. Therefore, the rules and regulations are easy to be implemented and then achieve good effects on environmental protection.
[mg5] Last but not least, Finally, the government can also provide enough funds and equipments when necessary during the process of problem solving.
[mg6] 

In conclusion, I think that the long-term environmental problems solving should depend on the joint efforts from all institutions all over of the world.

 

Hi, this is Sil and I am your writing tutor.

 

I commend the grouping of your thoughts and you were able to develop the value of international organizations. However, you did not fully answer the question.

 

Let’s review the question:

Solving environmental problems should be the responsibility of one international organization instead of state or national government. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Your main idea answered the question:

I believe that solving environmental problems should not be the responsibility of one international organization alone.

 

But your body did not explain why it is not the sole responsibility of international organizations.

 

Let’s break-up your body

 

Paragraph 1: This paragraph explains the capabilities of international organizations to solve environmental problems.

 

Paragraph 2: This paragraph explains the role of the local government in solving environmental problems

 

No paragraph talked about why international organizations should not be the only one responsible for solving t

 

An example of a supporting detail to establish this would:

 

International organizations cannot be solely responsible in solving environmental problems because a nation’s people contribute to the destruction of the environment primarily by not properly disposing their wastes. Thus, if they help destroy the environment then they as individuals and their government should be responsible in saving the environment.

 

The key words are “not solely responsible for solving environmental problems.” So you should not only mention the capabilities of each institution, instead you should be able to show a need for them to work together.

 

Your overall rating for this task is 5. If you will be able to improve on the content while making sure you can answer the question completely, then your rating will surely increase.

 

Assessment

Task Response 5

Coherence and Cohesion 5

Lexical Resource 5

Grammatical Range and Accuracy 5

 

Revision

 

An increasing numbers of environmental problems make both institutions and governments concerned. I believe that solving such problems should not be the responsibility of one international organization alone.

To begin with, international organizations such as World Wildlife Fund or WWF are indeed professionals in solving environment problems. These organizations have the ability to call for experts in related fields from all over the globe. Most of them possess highly specialized knowledge and rich experiences on environmental issues. Additionally, a great deal of resources is available in and is used by international organizations such as: automated detection machines, advanced robots, and support equipment, which are far more effective in solving environmental problems. Furthermore, international organizations can gather the helps from various countries and take charge of international cooperation,; and thus, can effectively solve environmental issues.

However, the government's unique function is legislation which standardizes behaviors in managing and improving environmental protection through policies so that serious problems would be controlled to some extent. Finally, the government can also provide enough funds and equipment when necessary during the process of problem solving.

In conclusion, I think that the long-term environmental problems solving should depend on the joint efforts from all institutions all over the world.

 

Good Luck!

 


 [mg1]Governments are also institutions. Maybe what you mean is “private and public insitutions”

 [mg2]The “indeed “is very important here because it indicates that there is an opposite idea to come in the next paragraph.

 [mg3]The subject here is not “resources” but “a great deal” which is singular, so the verb should be “is”

 [mg4]The plural of equipment has no ‘s’

 [mg5]Not because a policy is authorized it automatically means that it is easily implemented.

 [mg6]You have to provide examples of policies.

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